Trusting the flow

A little bit more than a week ago, I was in Jaipur and decided to go to the train station to buy some of the tickets I thought I was gonna need, according to the itinerary I had planned.  So, as I mentioned a few posts ago, itineraries change in India.  Since things were changing, I went to the train station to cancel my Jodhpur to Jaiselmer ticket because I was going to be somewhere else before heading to Jaiselmer.  Well, things changed again and I needed that same ticket once more.  I bought it again but I was wait listed in position 19.  Once I arrived to Jodhpur, I went to the train station to beg for them to help me get some kind of ticket since I needed to meet friends in Jaiselmer and needed to board that train. They told me to come back the next day, my only day left in Jodhpur.  I was so worried, I went to find out about buses which could be a great plan b.  Feeling a bit sad because things weren’t working as desired, I decided to forget about all this ticket situation and explore Jodhpur instead of going to the train station.  Otherwise I was gonna lose my chance to see that city.

So I went to the Fort and museum.  There I met a German guy and a French couple.  We enjoyed Jaswant Thada (the white temple near the palace) together, went for lunch, walked arround, shared an auto rickshaw to Umaid Bhavan Palace, where we were not allowed to enter the palace because it was too late, watched the sunset, walked around the market, ate dinner, met a couple of more travelers and had some beers.  To make the story short, the new German friend, who was traveling by car with a driver, was heading to Jaiselmer the next morning too and offered me a ride.  Problem solved!!! I had a fun day enjoying the city instead of trying to get the train ticket, and as a result I got a ride by car and made amazing new friends.  I guess sometimes you just have to let go and trust the flow.  I know that it will not be like this with everything, but sometimes it will, so it’s worth to trust that things will fall into place every now and then… and this only happens when you make yourself free and trust in destiny.


money… money… money

One of the things you have to get used to in India, is that if you look like a foreigner, you will attract people that will offer you just about anything for money.  They will start by asking you where you come from, what your name is, why you are acting so serious, why won’t you talk to them when they just want to become friends, etc, etc.  If you respond to them, you will be followed by some and they will offer to take you shopping to the best place here or there, that they sell this and that, and so on. I actually became very good at creating a barrier between me and people I don’t want to talk to and simply keep walking.  

What I haven’t gotten so good at is at knowing when I’m being asked for more money than what I should pay for and at bargaining strong enough.  For example, yesterday I found out that I payed twice what other people payed in the same bus from Jaipur to Pushkar… And even worse, one day at a small shoe shop, I payed 6 times more for a pair of sandals.  I got so upset! It has been the only time in this trip in which I have lost my temper.  I went back to the shoe store to complain and ended up screaming like crazy to the guy that sold the sandals to me.  All of these happened in the middle of a crowded market. I’m sure I entertained everyone there with my great act (locals and tourists included).

I know that with a little time, I’ll get better with all of these bargaining stuff and become smarter with money. It’s just about gaining some more street time in India and elsewhere in the world. Because this happens everywhere.  What will be harder is controlling those moments in which I get upset and lose all my balance… because literally, I had been all peaceful and happy, and in matter of seconds I was almost crying out of frustration.

Looking back at that moment, I think I can see the button that was pushed for me to become so upset.  I’ll pay more attention to it and try to control that button better.  This is one of the great things about India.  It allows you to pay attention to such small things that are so important.

I payed 900 Rs for a pair of sandals that I found were sold for 150 Rs in other places. What I’ll do is I’ll go get another pair for 150 Rs and imagine that I payed 525 Rs for each pair.  That will give me peace of mind, an extra pair of shoes, and a new lesson to cherish from my experience in this beautiful country. 

Itineraries change in India


Everybody had told me that in India it was better to not have a plan… and that if you were to have a plan, to be aware that it was going to change.  Well ladies and gentlemen, it is true.  I just changed my plan yesterday and will change it again today.  Pushkar wasn’t part of my itinerary.  Yesterday I got on a bus from Jaipur to Pushkar, was planing to head today to Delhi, then suddenly I just liked Pushkar too much and here I am, taking Delhi out of the equation and staying here for a couple of days more.

I still think that it’s good to have a plan, you just can’t attach to it.  In India you litteraly have to go with the flow because things change and will change every minute. No wonder why Indian people keep saying and reminding you that you have to stick to the present.  The past is gone now and you have no control of the future, so you might as well just make the best of what you have in front of you right now. 

I used to say that it sounded easy in theory, yet it wasn’t easy in practice.  Well I take it back.  This shouldn’t be complicated at all.  We just complicate our lives and overthink too much.  Here’s an example: I’m hungry now, so I’ll just stop writing and will head out to get myself an aloo paratha and eat! 🙂

No stop signs in Mumbai!

After being picked up at from the Mumbai airport, my first question was: Why can’t I see any stop signs? The answer was: Because there are no stop signs here!  Funny at that moment… but not so funny the morning after when I had to cross a street for the first time.  Not only I was crossing my first India street, but it was a roundabout (a roundabout with cows chilling out in it, by the way).  There are no clear lanes, no special area to cross, no stop signs!  Cars, rickshaws, bikes, people, dogs, and actually any animal, share the same space to transit with no hierarchy… and for some reason it works out.  Yes, they are able to make it work like some kind of organized chaos.  I’ve been close to death on these streets, yet I’m learning how to dance along this rhythm with no rhythm.

Tip: Just follow someone’s step closely when crossing the street.  Locals are used to these streets, you’re not.  If they make it safe  to the other side, then you will too. Oh, and to not stop in the middle of the action.  If you’re not sure if you should go or not go, just go.  Cars are used to have people on the way.  

Welcome to India, Cute Face


The first thing I was told on Indian territory, was “cute face”.  It was one of the officers in Costumes who gave me that interesting welcome.  Obviously I took it as a positive compliment and headed to baggage claim.  I couldn’t wait to get my bag and head outside the airport since I had been flying and transferring for the last 28 hours.  

Waiting for my suitcase was my second contact with people and it was quite an experience.  So many people fighting to have access to the row of bags, suitcases and boxes, I had to become one of them pushing and fighting for a spot in the front.  It didn’t matter if I didn’t understand what they were saying, I wasn’t gonna be left aside.  I was keeping my spot.  Unfortunately after more than an hour, people started leaving and then I understood my baggage was lost.  Welcome to India! 

It’s been 28 hours since I landed and still don’t have my stuff.  Neither the airline or the security company where I bought my travel insurance  are being responsive, but it doesn’t matter because I am having a great time meeting new people, hanging out with my friend Sujit and his family, and trying amazing vegetarian food.


Today I woke up remembering and missing both of my grandmothers.

Such a special and particular friendship that I shared with each of these ladies, I know I’ll cherish it in my heart forever. At times I remember feeling a huge barrier of decades separating our way of thinking and behaving, but some other times our conversations would just flow as if there were no generations between us.  What’s more interesting is that we would get this ageless connection when we talked about love and broken hearts.  So many feelings women share, no matter how different we are or the context we live in.

One of my grandmas wanted me to get married with my first boyfriend when I was 17, my other grandma would always tell me to not marry so that I wouldn’t be exposed to so much pain.  Ironically, she’s the one who would do just about anything to make my grandfather happy.  Parallel to discouraging marriage, she wanted me to find a good man.  So I guess that her message was that it was ok to love someone as long as you don’t allow your happiness to depend on someone else’s.

I won’t be able to get more direct advise from either of my grandmothers, yet I’m glad I had the chance to spend quality time with them the year before losing each one of them.  They shared with me their thoughts, their worries, their joys, their wisdom.  I will always carry these sweet memories with me, because remembering will be like going for a cup of coffee with them whenever I want to.

So, if you still have you grandmothers around, go visit them.  Spend some time with them, you’ll be amazed to see how much you might have in common.

Traveling Solo: My first trip to India


If you click on the title above, you’ll go to an article by Yara Coelho in Thought Catalog that gives 7 reasons why you should travel alone at least once in your life:

1. You will meet amazing people
2. The overwhelming sense of absolute freedom
3. Traveling alone challenges your fears and insecurities
4. Fall in love
5. You can take the time to nurture yourself
6. You’ll have a chance to recreate yourself and be who you want to be
7. You can finally take time to leave everything else behind

In my opinion, the best thing about traveling alone is to be excited and scared at the same time and then realizing you are totally capable of managing yourself in an unknown place, being able to have fun, learn, share, and maybe even rediscover a new you.  Each time you travel solo you’re giving yourself the chance to open a window to opportunities (that might surprise you) outside of your comfort zone.  It’s showing yourself that YOU can do it, and THAT is empowering.  It’s disconnecting from your everyday life in order to appreciate it even more when you get back home.

Next week I’ll be traveling solo to India for 5 weeks.  I don’t know what might go right or wrong, what I will like or don’t like, no clue of what will happen.  What I do know is that I’m giving myself a chance to explore something new in me and in my life, to hopefully grow and have more to give to myself and others.  The countdown has started, wish me luck!

A sad cold night

Tonight I was heading for a drink to a bar a few blocks away from home with a good old friend and for some reason the sidewalk was blocked and closed by the police.  We went around it and I couldn’t help asking one of them what was going on.  They moved to the side and showed us a covered body laying on the ground.  One of them explained he was a homeless man who apparently died freezing that night. We kept walking.  It was so sad to just wonder for how long had this man been there and if anyone could possibly be out there looking for him.

I am aware that we come alone to this world and alone we go, but is it selfish to wish to no die alone and to expect for someone to cry and miss you after you’re gone? Today made me think about life and how fast it passes by, it reminded me how fortunate I am for what I have.  I live two blocks away from where this man died, in a warm apartment and sleep in a cozy bed with a fluffy cover, and for the past days I’ve been feeling sad for things that cannot be compared to the pain this man must have gone through in this cold night.  I hope that he now rests in peace, and that his loved ones are able to find him.  I wanna keep reminding myself to be thankful for what I have and suffer less for things that shouldn’t matter as much.  If I’m able to be grateful for everything I am and everything I have, I’m pretty sure there won’t be as much space in my heart for sadness.

To honor this man, I promise to honor gratitude.

So what if you’re a single successful career driven woman?

I read “Study finds single successful women are career driven because they are not marriage worthy, what?” by Megan Charles in the Inquisitr an it just disturbed me too much.  Here’s the link: 

It’s based on a collaborative study by 2 researchers: Dr. Kristina Durante and Dr. Vlad Griskevicius and they state very strong comments such as:

“Women who judged themselves to be less desirable to men, those women who are not like Angelina Jolie, were most likely to take the career path when men became scarce”

I’m pretty certain that women who judged themselves to be intelligent and valuable were the ones most likely to take a career path, not because they weren’t pretty or men became scarce.  Hello?? I have nothing against marriage, but that it’s not what dictates all of our decisions.

It is very unfortunate that being successful or career-driven can be associated with a lack of beauty or as a response to not seeing it viable to get married.  It just discredits women’s merits.

…and although not all single-successful-career-driven women look like celebrities, that is not what determines our drive to get an education, stand up for ourselves and stand out as professionals.  We have brains and if men can see value in that, then that’s when marriage becomes a beautiful option.  If people keep judging us for not getting married early enough, then ciao, adiós, au revoir, sayonara, goodbye, we have important things to do that probably matter more than to debate with such closed minds.

Being a young adult


This year, as part of my 2014 resolutions, I decided to start blogging about what it is for me to be a young adult, having to deal with adulthood responsibilities, feeling so young at heart.  Even creating this blog is probably part of my 30s life crisis.

According to Erik Erikson’s stages of human development, a young adult is generally a person in the age range of 20 to 40.  I believe that in our 20s we explore who we can become by making lots of mistakes that won’t be as judged as they will be later on.  In our 30s we’re supposed to know who we are, become great professionals, make money, show the world how good we are in whatever we decide to accomplish, buy properties, stay healthy, invest, get married (if we haven’t already), and obviously have babies ASAP because the biological clock is ticking.  Sooo much pressure!

In this blog, I’ll write about my everyday life, so I guess I’ll complain every now and then, but I will also write about what I’m learning in this journey.  I’ll post pictures, links, articles, and hopefully have fun sharing anything that might interest me now, in my 30s.

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